When Life is not a day at the Park

Are we paying attention to the people around us?

There are some moments when time stands still. Fear paralyzes. Life flashes. Heart races.

Firetrucks and police cars surrounding the high school. Helicopters overhead. No, this can’t be good. “Lord, let it not be….” “Lord, please keep them safe.” “Lord, what can we do to help them?”

Hundreds of questions race through our minds as we are locked on the outside and they are locked on the inside. “Are they okay?” Thanks to modern technology, we could text the kids inside. They already knew the grim news that we were waiting to hear. I got the text, “Apparently someone came to school with a gun and shot himself.”

You are not ready to deal with this reality in high school. You are not ready to deal with it as an adult. Too hard. Too much. “Why, God?” has to be the question that we all ask in unison.

He had his whole life in front of him. He was so young. He was successful. He was loved. “Why would he want to die?”

There are no answers. He cannot tell us. He is gone.

But he did scream a silent message: “I’m done.” He wanted everyone to know. It wasn’t private. It was some kind of personal declaration that he wanted the school and community to hear loud and clear. What was he trying to say?

I didn’t know Marcus, but I can guess what he was trying to say.  Something like, “It’s not worth it anymore.  I’m fried.  I will never succeed in life.  It’s too hard.  No one can help me.  I’m tired of being judged.  I’m tired of competing.  I don’t have any hope.  I don’t have any purpose in life.  It’s better if I just go now.”

Or, maybe he was angry at his parents, school or friends.  Maybe he thought he’d teach somebody a lesson to mess with him:  “I’ll show you.”

What could make someone so miserable or angry to take their own life?

We don’t know.  But what we do know is this:  Every life counts.  Every person matters.  Every student needs to feel that they are loved and that they belong.  Why don’t they feel it?

It takes a tragedy to startle a community to action.  Maybe this was his intention.  He was tired of life.  Tired of school.  Tired of social media. Tired of keeping up.  Tired of pushing away his emotions.  Tired of pretending that he was okay.  Tired of pain.  And he wanted everyone to wake up to the fact that he is not the only one.

Too many teens are under too much pressure.  There is something wrong with the world, with society, with school.  They feel the weight of the world on their shoulders, when they should be enjoying entering a new season of their lives.

If we are honest, we must admit that most of us are pretending.  We are hiding our brokenness under a presentable exterior.  We are holding it together on the outside even when we are falling apart inside.

Too many teenagers don’t have anyone to be real with.  They don’t share their struggles and find the support that they need.  The only way that they will learn to be real in their relationships and honest about their lives, is if they see that kind of authenticity modeled to them, in the world, in society, in church, in school, and at home.

We are all responsible.

Consider this suicide a warning for others, that we need to love better.  We need to care more.  We need to listen, and stop being so self-absorbed and distracted that we miss someone’s pain.

And if you are one that has Hope, then Give It! Share It! Preach It! Live It! There are too many people being quiet and peaceful when hurting people walk by. We need to take action. We need to reach out and care. We need to ask how people are doing, and speak truth and light into their lives.

If we don’t, then who will?